Thursday, July 23, 2009
Time for a change
It's been raining here all day....yuck! Actually, I'm not minding the rain too much today because it gives me a chance to veg for a bit -- something I desperately need to do.
I took Luke to his swimming lesson this morning. We didn't end up going to Tims because he ate four pieces of toast this morning -- yes, I said FOUR! The only thing that stopped him from eating five pieces was that we were in a rush to get to swimming on time.
I went out for lunch yesterday with one of my bestest friends for sushi to our favourite little restaurant. Mmmm, sushi! She moved back from New York a few weeks ago and I'm so happy she's back.
After lunch, I realized how much I really missed her. She left six years ago on her own when I was pregnant with Lucas and is now back with a wonderful husband, the sweetest little boy and a cute dog too. She also made me realize that I'm stuck in a rut and that I've been stuck like this for awhile.
I had to leave work almost four years ago (next month will be four years) because of my MS. I had all these plans to get our house organized, workout, do things with my family while I still can. I haven't really done any of that. I don't know if it's this feeling that's making me more tired (is that even possible?), if it's the MS progressing, having two kids, or all of it combined. I seem to do so much for others that by the time I get to doing something for myself, I'm exhausted.
All these memories of before kids started flooding back the other day -- how Steve and I used to go out for dinner to nice restaurants (we never were clubbers or people who bar hopped), our camping trips, trips to Cuba, Costa Rica, Vancouver, New York, hanging out on the couch watching tv or movies without being interrupted. We haven't done those things in ages and I miss it.
I love having kids and doing things with them but everyone needs some downtime, to do something for them every so often that doesn't involve changing diapers, watching kids shows, playing referee or trying to tame a meltdown because they can't find one of those damn little Bakugan balls. I say this to myself but have yet to listen. It's just easier to say than actually do.
So, for the next little while I'm going to figure out what I can do to give me the lift I need. I've been doing some organizing around the house which is helping declutter my mind a bit. There is so much more to do though. I'm not very good at finding a place for everything so I've been searching for ideas on how to better organize my life, house and everything in between. If you have any good tips, websites, books or suggestions please let me know. I'm on a mission to get my life in order!
I think I'll also work on this blog a bit since it's been helping me find myself. I'm trying to figure out how to design a new masthead/banner but I'm not very artsy. I'll keep plugging away at it though.
I've also enjoyed reading other peoples blogs as well. It's amazing how many blogs are out there and I seem to find a new one daily. It's like a whole new world to me!
Thanks everyone for sharing your stories. I'm really enjoying the reads.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Sugar rush

I showed him where the end of the line was. He stood there next to all the other people towering over him, trying to blend in while the giants glanced down below at this mini version of them grinning from ear to ear.
"I'm getting a donut!" he explained as if he had to state his purpose in line.
Lucas got up to the counter, his chin barely touching the top, he opened his hand to display his somewhat shiny coin that looked over sized in his small little palm and asked for his deep fried circle of sugary goodness.
The ultimate sugar rush!
As I watched the red, blue and yellow sprinkles melt on the sides of his mouth, I was amazed at just how big a donut can appear when a kid is eating it. Even next to Luke's head. This was a boy who always needed buttons around his neck or two sizes bigger in hats just for his head to fit. I guess he's finally growing into his head.
Sniff, my boy is growing up.
Next he'll be asking if he can have the keys to the car. He already asked if he could have his own cellphone on the way home.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Fave rave: Lip gloss and soap
Welcome to Canada, Bath & Body Works!
I know, I know, it's been like what, almost a year? But, oh my gawd, I'm still so excited!!!
My favourites so far are the foaming soaps and the lip gloss.
Not only do the foaming soaps smell great, they're also not too bad on the pocket and great for the kids. I find there's very little mess (something all parents can be thankful for I'm sure) and since it's foam, it's easier to lather and easier to rinse off.
Oh, and the lip gloss, it's like lollipops on your lips which makes me realize just how much of this stuff I must ingest on a daily basis. My favourite so far is Limeade Liplicious.
I just bought the new mint gloss the other day and it's fantabulous! When I put it on it gives that fresh breath, just brushed my teeth feeling...which I do, oh, only about five times a day. My poor enamel might thank me for this new lip gloss.
Thank you Bath & Body Works for finally making Canada your home!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Budding Archaeologist
Lucas: Did you know you can see my artifacts?
And by artifacts, he was talking about his ribs protruding from his scrawny little body.
You would think we never fed the kid...and this was after a big helping of spaghetti and garlic bread.
I think he's been playing a little too much Indiana Jones on the Wii and Nintendo DS.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Paving Paradise


The neighbourhood tried so hard to stop a building from going up in our open green space beside the lake. It was a park that The Town felt wasn't being used enough. They were wrong. It was a place for people to kick a ball, fly a kite, throw a frizbee, run, pick dandilions -- a breathtaking spot.
In the end, we lost.
We did change the Town's view of what the building was going to look like. You should have seen it before. It was hideous. Thankfully, the design looks more like the surrounding houses than an eye sore.
So, what was once this...
will soon be this....
I laughed and rolled my eyes at this sign the first time I saw it. While the design of the building doesn't look all that bad, the picture is the side of the building that will be facing the water and not what you will see from the street. From the street you will see the back of the building -- a brick wall pretty much.
By day, a building that will probably hardly get used. By night, when the doors are locked, the neighbours have a bet on how long it will turn into the local midnight hangout. I know kids need somewhere to go but when you can't see behind this building from the street and it's dark, I don't want to even think of what might happen.
I really hope this building doesn't turn into a mistake. I'm praying that it adds to the community instead of becoming something that it wasn't meant to be.
Only time will tell.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Highway Of Heroes
On my way to pick up Lucas from camp yesterday, the bridge I drive over was lined with people -- people waiting to pay tribute to two more fallen soldiers making their way down the Highway Of Heroes (the stretch of the 401 highway from CRB Trenton to Toronto).
This is the second time in a week I've seen the bridge lined. It's just so sad especially when my mentality is can't we all just get along.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Nosey without asking
1.
What is your occupation right now?
Personal Shopper, Chef, Chauffeur, Booger Picker, Bumb Wiper. I guess some like to call it a SAHM.
2.
What colour are your socks right now?
Socks? What socks? Oh my god, I lost my socks! Has anyone seen my socks?
3.
What are you listening to right now?
the voices in my head. They keep yelling at me. Tell them to stop!
4.
What was the last thing that you ate?
chocolate covered ju jubes. I just ate the last one...sorry.
5.
Can you drive a stick shift?
No....just seems like too much extra work to make a car go.
6.
Last person you spoke to on the phone?
Um...maybe my mom this morning before I went to her house.
7.
Do you like the person who sent this to you?
Love her....hugs!
8.
How old are you today?
12215 days old . Uh, maybe I should have stuck with saying 33 years old...I officially made myself feel older than I really am.
9.
What is your favourite sport to watch on TV?
Basketball! I think it's one of the few sports I really understand....kinda, sorta.
10.
What is your favourite drink?
water and white wine but not mixed together because watered down white wine is just gross.
11.
Have you ever dyed your hair?
Have I ever dyed my hair? You're asking me if I've ever dyed my hair? Really? You have to ask? Um, well, yeah, I've dyed my hair....because I wasn't blond enough and thought Blondissima was the way to go. Didn't everyone jump on the let's dye our hair with drug store dye bandwagon and the Sun-in one too? You can't tell me I was the only one. I even dyed my hair three times in one day because I had turned it green the day before some dinner/dance thing in College. Yes, you read that right...THREE TIMES! What the hell kind of substance was I abusing in College to think my scalp and hair needed to be strip searched and then candy coated in peroxide?! I haven't dyed my hair since. Now I'm au naturel and proud of it!
12.
Favourite food?
We could be here all day. Right now I'm craving sushi.
13.
What is the last movie you watched?
The Hangover. Don't believe the hype or maybe I was just too hungover on Betaseron to appreciate the witty stupidity of what a lot of people are calling the funniest movie they've seen in a long time. Um, ya, I think that's it because that movie was right up my alley.
14.
Favourite day of the year?
any day that is sunny and warm
15.
How do you vent anger?
constantly complain about whatever is bugging me until something new starts bugging me. Steve just loves this about me...don't you honey? I can picture him saying yeah, right once he reads this.
16.
What was your favourite toy as a child?
Her name is Suzy AND SHE'S NOT A TOY! Ok, ok, it was Barbies. Yes, those dolls shaped like porn stars. The things kids were a loud to play with in my day. The horror!
17.
What is your favourite season?
Summer, summer, summer time. Ha, now I have that song in your head...and mine too, crap.
18.
Cherries or Blueberries?
Blueberries but now I feel bad that I left out cherries. Oh dang, you're both great!
19.
Do you want your friends to e-mail you back?
or you could just comment back. Isn't that the cool thing to do around here anyway? ;)
20.
Who is the most likely to respond?
voices, THE VOICES I TELL YA.
21.
Who is least likely to respond?
Well, now that I just yelled at the voices I think they might be on strike along with all the other City workers in Toronto.
22.
Living arrangements?
In a van down by the river. Ok, ok...it's a house, not a van, and we live by the lake, not the river. And if you read this blog you already know that. Man, I miss that Chris Farley.
23.
When was the last time you cried?
A little choked up from Michael Jackson's Memorial. I shed a tear during Luke's last tantrum.
24.
What is on the floor of your closet?
laundry, shoes, backpacks, stuff I really should put away.
25.
Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending to
Sheba but I'm not technically sending this to her....I just know she'll eventually read it.
26.
What did you do last night?
I could barely remember who I called this morning and now I have to remember what happened last night? Shesh, you think I had a brain or something.
yes, I'm still here.....
just trying to remember what I did last night......
It will come to me.....
Not now obviously.....but it will come to me....
27.
What are you most afraid of?
dying or someone close to me dying...though that part has already happened (my dad died when I was 17 years old for those that don't know)
28.
Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers?
plain with ketchup, mustard, relish and onion on a sesame seed bun. That's not really plain now, is it?
29.
Favourite dog breed?
Old English Sheep dog, St Bernard, Golden Retriever, those little white something-poo's that look like a fluff ball.
Speaking of dogs, I once had a dog named Diva (the name she came with). I was around 6 or 7 years old when we got her. My mom saw an ad in the paper saying "free to good home" and so Diva became ours. We think she was part terrier with some lab but who knows. My brother and I thought she looked a bit like Splinter from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles but with bangs. She was a happy, hyper dog (did I mention she was hyper) and would always jet out the door the second someone opened it a crack. Shesh, you think we never walked the dog. She died when she was 16 years old I think.
30.
Favourite day of the week?
Mon, Tues, Thurs....I have the house to myself! Yes, I love my family but everyone needs time to hear themselves breath, fart, whatever floats your boat.
31.
How many provinces have you lived in?
one.
I've always wondered why people in the US say Toronto, Canada and not Toronto, ONTARIO, Canada. When we talk about the US we say Los Angeles, California. or Memphis, Tennessee not Memphis, United States. Why is that?
32.
Diamonds or pearls?
Diamonds. No oyster puke for me thanks.
33.
What is your favourite flower?
Roses, peonies, hydrangeas (and tons more) but I'm sure you could guess that from my garden pictures.
Back to #26 because now I finally remember what I did last night. We watched Lucas play soccer. I think Luke's nickname should be Dash (from The Incredibles). That boy can run! They lost last night but Luke was honoured with Player Of The Game. He was excited about his ribbon and coupon the coach gave him and kept asking when we could go play his free round of Mini Putt. Way to go, Lucas!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Monday morning
I'm sitting here with my Timmie's coffee and banana nut muffin enjoying the silence. Ahhhh!
I think I'm going to try to tackle the back garden today and hopefully add two new ones in the back corners....that's if I have the energy. I can't stand seeing just fence when I look out my back windows. I need some green, some garden life!
I haven't been feeling too bad lately. Mega Superbitch is enjoying the summer air. Thank goodness! Why she has to be a total asshat in the winter is beyond me. I'm still tired all.the.time. but the sun and warmth seems to give me a lift. I just wish the weather was like this all year.
I love Canada but I really think I should be living somewhere that's always warm. We're in our forever home (or so we say) so we won't be up and leaving anytime soon. I keep hinting that maybe when we retire we could head down to Florida, buy a cool golf cart and call a trailer home for the winter. My friends parents do this and it sounds awesome!
I'm going to finish my coffee and then head outside.
Hope everyone enjoys their Monday!
Friday, July 3, 2009
TGIF
Both kids were home today. The minute daddy left for work, Lucas wanted a friend over to play. This was at 8:15 in the morning. Asking for a friend to come over to play this early in the morning is pretty much becoming a ritual now that school is out. I was able to postpone calling a friend until 9:30am which is when he found out that there were no friends home to play with.
And cue meltdown.
An almost 2 HOUR meltdown.
I keep saying to myself that one day I'll write about his tantrums. I think it might be therapeutic for me to talk about them. They have been very trying to say the least. I have never seen another child so intense when it comes to having a tantrum but I'm sure there are other parents out there who are dealing with the same type of tantrums we have to deal with. I have yet to find them but I'm sure they're out there. Maybe if I write about the tantrums, someone will say "I know exactly how you feel because we're dealing with the same thing". I think a lot of weight would be lifted from my shoulders the day I find these people.
Lucas is such a sweet boy that people are usually shocked when I tell them about his tantrums or taken back when they walk into our world while Luke's having one. They don't understand how I can remain so calm. We've been dealing with them for 4 years or so now that it doesn't seem to phase me much anymore. It just drains me.
One day I actually filmed him while he was having a tantrum and then showed the video to him. He wasn't impressed. I think he was a bit shocked, maybe even a bit scared at the way he was acting. Having a tantrum is one thing but I guess seeing yourself having a tantrum is another. I wish I had filmed today's tantrum. It was a doozy and not one I care to write about right now. Let's just say it brought me to tears.
Thankfully, the day ended on a nice note. We all went out for dinner to Swiss Chalet.
Lucas fell asleep in the car on the ride home.
Though she didn't fall asleep in the car, Bella had an easier time falling asleep tonight (and before 9:30pm too...wahoo!).
This is another thing that's draining, putting our kids to bed. Bella needs someone to fall asleep with her, that someone being me. She has to be playing with my hair to fall asleep. If I even so much as flinch she grabs a hold of my hair even tighter. I keep telling myself that it won't last, that I'll one day be able to say goodnight to her and she'll put herself to bed. For now, I'll just take the extra cuddles.