Six

January 15, 2004

Today I had a doctor’s appointment. Dr. El Tayeb said that you haven’t gotten any bigger and I am starting to dilate, about one centimeter so far. She said that it might be better if you came sooner than later so she suggested that I be induced. I said that I would be fine with that if it was better for you to be out in the world rather than in my tummy. The doctor suggested that I be induced tomorrow and an instant smile came on my face. I am still in shock. I am to be at the hospital for 7:30am tomorrow morning and that it might take a little while for you to come. I called daddy as soon as my doctor appointment was over. He is so excited…we all are! I can’t believe that you could be here as soon as tomorrow. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

......

That was the last entry in my pregnancy journal before Lucas, my first child, was born. A child who would change my world for the better and who would teach me how important it is to enjoy every moment of life, to be patient and not take everything so seriously. He gave my life a new meaning, a new purpose, a new vocabulary. Now I had to get used to the words mommy, daddy, son, grandparents, uncle, grandson, diaper, 3am, poop (and every word you could think of to describe it).

January 16th, 2004 is still so clear in my mind. I remember the noises in the hall at the hospital, when the grandparents arrived, how cold it was outside that day -- I think a snow storm was brewing. I remember being induced at 8:30am thinking I would be hanging around for awhile only to find out I was dilating faster than expected. I asked for an epidural when I was about six centimeters but I think I was closer to eight centimeters by the time I actually got it. I remember telling them that the epidural didn't seem to be working so they pumped it up more. Heaven! That was between noon and 12:30pm. At 1:30pm I was checked again and fully dilated. Wow, that was fast! What happened to this process taking time? The grandparents arrived with little time to spare and made their way to the waiting room. They didn't have to wait long. After three simple pushes Lucas Carter was born at 1:52pm. "That's it?" I recall saying as the nurses and doctors chuckled. I guess I was expecting more. A lot of the shows on TV make labour out to be so dramatic and I guess I thought that should be me too. I'm thankful everything happened the way it did. I had a great pregnancy, a wonderful labour and a beautiful, healthy boy. The next day we brought our son home.

[Lucas at one day old getting ready to leave the hospital]

It's hard to believe that was six years ago. There are days I still can't believe I'm a mom but I can't imagine my world any other way.

Happy Birthday, Lucas!
I love you higher than the moon, deeper than the ocean,
more than there are stars shining above.
Forever and always, I love you xo

[Lucas getting ready to blow out his candles]